The Yugi Motou Shou
by Color KATastrophe
Summary: Looking for a good laugh? Come and join the audience of the Yugi Motou Shou! Yugi and Yami host. what could happen? review please! Now taken over by Yami Bakura and Marik.. Oh dear...
1. The Primere Episode

Ok.. I got bored and I just ate a great cake so I'm kinda ..HYPER!!!!!!  
  
But besides that Welcome to the Yugi Motou Show!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh.. but I still have the power to manipulate them to do my bidding.. *evil laugh.* People's I have to say one thing.. I hope you all review and if you do I shall give you cake and cookies and i'm lying.. and other strange and useless junk I find. So Review please. And I know you like it!!  
  
The lights blare on blinding Yugi Motou who sits behind a desk.  
  
Yugi: "STUPID LIGHTS!!!"  
  
Yami: "Just say damn. You know you want to.."  
  
Yugi: "I will not curse you damn Yami."  
  
Yami: -_-;  
  
Yugi: "My eyes burn.." *squints and his eyes pop out* "Come BACK!!" *runs after his eyes*  
  
Yami: -_-; "Don't worry it's only his contacts."  
  
Yugi: "DAMN CONTACTS!!!" *sits back in his chair and places the contacts where they belong (in his eyes) * "How come I have to wear contacts? Huh? I'm the hero of the story and I say no contacts."  
  
Yami: "Actually.. I am.."  
  
Yugi: "Go be gay with Seto or something!"  
  
Yami: "I AM NOT GAY!!! YOU DAMN FUCKERS!!! I TOLD YOU ONCE AND I'LL TELL YOU AGAIN I'M NOT GAY!!!"  
  
Yugi: "Liar."  
  
Yami: "Don't make me use my powers!!!"  
  
Yugi: "Like what? The 'I can't remember anything' spell?"  
  
Yami: "No the 'Obliterate' one moron."  
  
AyariChan02: "if you two don't start working I'll call over the monkey from the petting zoo!"  
  
Yugi: @_@ "NOOOOO!!!!" *jumps ten feet in the air and hides under the desk* "No monkey.. no.."*twitching*  
  
Yami: -_-; "Did you have to bring up the monkey?"  
  
AyariChan02: "Get to work or I'll call The monkey who's friend lives in the petting zoo."  
  
Yami: @_@ *screams* "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT THE MONKEY!!!"  
  
Technical Dude: "I don't think our viewers know what the Monkey from down the lane is."  
  
AyariChan02: "Then roll the clip!"  
  
Yugi: "MONKEY NO!!! NO MONKEY!!!"  
  
Yami: " OBLITERATE MONKEY!!!"  
  
Everyone else: -_-;  
  
The screen fades and shows Yami and Yugi at a petting zoo.  
  
Yugi: "I like zoo's!"  
  
Yami: "I'm not petting that goat."  
  
Yugi: *hugs goat* "But goats are sooooo cute!!  
  
Yami: "I'm not doing it.."  
  
Yugi: "Fine. You spoiled brat." *walks over to the monkey cages*  
  
Yami: "What is that ugly thing?" *points to baboon.*  
  
Yugi: "It's a monkey! Pretty monkey!!!" *pokes at monkey.*  
  
Monkey: OOOAAAAHHH!!! *puts but in Yugi's face*  
  
Yugi: "NNNOOOOOOO!! MOKEY POOO!!!"  
  
Yami: *laughing his head off*  
  
Yugi: *twitching on the floor *  
  
Monkey: "OOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" Jumps on another cage and opens it.* "OOOOOWWWWWAAAAA"  
  
Yami: *taps Yugi* Er.. Yugi?"  
  
Ryou runs into the area and grabs the baboon. Yami Bakura follows him and then snatches the monkey by the tail.  
  
Y. Bakura: "DUMB ASS MONKEYS!!!" *Throws monkey on ground.*  
  
Ryou: "Um.. I don't think we should have done that.."  
  
Y. Bakura: "Why not?"  
  
Ryou: *stares at the group of monkeys about to attack with their mouths foaming* That's why..  
  
Y. Bakura: "What the hell are they doing?" *notices the foaming mouths* "They have RAIBIES!! Cool they have raibies! I want one!!!" *Grabs a monkey which bites him*  
  
Yugi: "HI BAKURA!!!"  
  
Yami: -_-; "What are you doing here Bakura?"  
  
Ryou: " We work here part time." *smiles*  
  
Y. Bakura: "I like rabies!" *bites Yami* "HAH!! Now you shall die pharoh!!"  
  
Yami: "YUCK!!! I HAVE RABIES!!!"  
  
Ryou: "It's a nice surprise to see you here Yugi."  
  
Yugi: "Same here.. but.. what are we going to do about the monkeys?"  
  
The 4 look up at the monkeys.  
  
Yami: "WHO CARES ABOUT MONKEYS!! WHAT ABOUT MY RABIES!!"  
  
Yugi and Ryou: -_-;  
  
Y. Bakura: "Now Pharaoh feel the burning of the rabies as they infect you!!"  
  
Yami: "So you'll die too."  
  
Jounouchi: *runs over* MONKEY! MONKEY! *grabs a monkey and beings to pet him ferociously* "I love monkey. I shall name him Monkey and he shall be mine. My little monkey. I wll love him and pet him and hold him and squeeze him and call him George!"  
  
Yugi: -_-; "Jou.. Those monkeys have raibies."  
  
Jou: "Is that a kind of cake? I want some!"  
  
Y. Bakura: "No you bastard. Besides. You can't name it twice."  
  
Jou: "It's name is Monkey George Jounouchi!"  
  
Everyone but Jou: -_-;  
  
The monkeys attack and the flashback cuts off.  
  
Yugi: "Ok Ok. I'll start.." *manages to seat himself on the chair. The table comes to the top of his eyes.* "Ahem"  
  
Yami: "Oh yeah.. I forgot to set up your phone books." *slides three phone books under Yugi's butt.*  
  
Yugi: "Well now to our first guest.. Goku form Dragon Ball Z!"  
  
Goku steps on stage and sits in a chair.  
  
Yugi: "He's tall.."  
  
Yami: "What do you mean tall?"  
  
Yugi: "He's tall.. he's like 6 foot 29!!"  
  
Yami: "Yugi everyone looks 6 feet 29 to you."  
  
Goku: "Wait.. am on a t.v. show?"  
  
Yugi: "Well duh, Mr. Son."  
  
Yugi: "Tall people are stupid."  
  
Yami: "Don't' be ass. You'll have a growth spurt soon."  
  
Yugi: "When I do I'll take over the world with my tall powers!"  
  
Yami: "Yugi the tallest you'll get is 5 foot 3."  
  
Yugi: "DAMMIT!! I HATE TALL PEOPLE!! HATE!!" *starts to foam at the mouth*  
  
Yami: "You said you got your rabies shot!"  
  
Yugi: *foaming* "I hate needles."  
  
Goku: -_-; "Um.. I am the guest here. Shouldn't you two be talking to me?"  
  
Yugi: "Tall man is right."  
  
Yami: "So Goku.. What do you do for a living?"  
  
Goku: "Save the world. It's fun! Especially using the Kamehameha and the spirit bomb!"  
  
Yugi: "That's my job!"  
  
Yami: "Exactly!! We save the world not you!"  
  
Yugi: "YEAH!! YOU STUPID TALL PERSON!!!!"  
  
Goku: *sinks in his chair* "Ok.."  
  
Yugi: "Stealer of Jobs.. I'll call you Yami Goku. You evil stealer!!"  
  
Yugi: -_-; "So are you married?"  
  
Goku: "Yep. My wife's name is ChiChi. She's mean some times and let me tell ya. She has a bad temper. I mean gosh. All I did was die a few times and she goes ballistic when I come back!"  
  
Yugi: "Good you got what you deserved."  
  
ChiChi: *stomps up on stage* "BAD TEMPER??!! GOKU YOU'RE COMING HOME!!"  
  
Yugi: "SECURITY!!!"  
  
3 officers manage to pull ChiChi off the stage.  
  
Goku: "Thanks.. I'm afraid she'll want to kill me later.."  
  
Yami: "You died?"  
  
Goku: "Yep. It was fun. Visiting King Kai and Bubbles and everyone else that's up there."  
  
Yami: "Bubbles?"  
  
Goku: "A monkey."  
  
Yami: "MONKEY!!!!!" *hides under desk and starts twitching*  
  
Yugi: *pulls a load of wax out his ears.* "So do you have any tricks to show us?"  
  
Goku: "What kind of tricks?"  
  
Yami: *comes out from under desk smiling* "You know a fun trick." ^_^  
  
Goku: "Like a trick with balls? Like with my balls? Like with the holy balls that pulse with the power of a thousand moons? Like the Dragon Balls?! Like my balls?! Like my wrinkly balls?!"  
  
Yami: ^_^; "Actually like a trick as in you're powers."  
  
Goku: "Like the power of my balls?! Like the power of the Dragon Balls?!"  
  
Yugi: "Security."  
  
Goku is dragged of stage by 30 officers as he screams about balls.  
  
Yugi: "Thank god."  
  
Yami: "Thank the mighty Ra!!" *stands up like a preacher* "For we all know his powers are holy! His powers can rule the world! He can do anything as long as we believe! As long as we praise him!! PRAISE RA!!!"  
  
Yugi: "Yami! What did we say about preaching about Ra?"  
  
Yami: "Don't.."  
  
Yugi: "So what are you going to do?"  
  
Yami: "Sit down and stop praising Ra."  
  
Yugi: "SO DO IT!"  
  
Yami: *sits down* "But still.. Ra is all."  
  
Yugi: "Marik is supposed to preach about Ra, anyway."  
  
Yami: "Sorry. I just wanted to try it. As the king of-"  
  
AyariChan02: "Isn't there another guest speaker?"  
  
Yamii: *looks down at the list on the table.* "Nope. It says that tomorrow we talk to Ayari K. Crawford."  
  
AyariChan02: "Oh.. I know who she is."  
  
Yugi: "Duh. You wrote about her."  
  
Yami: "Well at least this gives us a chance to meet her."  
  
Yugi: *gets a expression of awe* : ) "Do you think she'll really come?"  
  
Yami: -_-; "Probably."  
  
Yugi: *looks down at list and realizes it say's Marik Ishtar and Yami Bakura* "You jerk!!! YOU BASTARD!! YOU LIED!!!"  
  
Yami: "What did we say about cursing?"  
  
Yugi: "Don't.."  
  
Yami: "So?"  
  
Yugi: "Sorry. I liked it though.. the rage and the anger!! IT WAS HEAVEN!! PURE FUCKI-"  
  
Yami: "YUGI!!"  
  
AyariChan02: "Let's see.. what can we do about his. We still have 15 minutes on air." *looks around at technical dude* "Put on a comer-"  
  
Random Fan Girl #1: "YUGI!! WE LOVE YOU!!!" *jumps up and down in seat in the audience. Runs up and hugs Yugi*  
  
Yugi: *being glomped* ".. Help please."  
  
Random Fan Girl #2: "LET'S STEAL HIS BUCKLES AND SELL THEM ON EBAY!!!"  
  
The fan girls all attack Yugi and run off with the buckles that were once on his body and/or clothes.  
  
Yugi: "I feel so naked."  
  
Yami: "Duh. When was the last time you took those things off?"  
  
Yugi: ".. Well.. I've had them on for about 2 years.."  
  
Yami: -_-; "Did you wash with those dumb things on?"  
  
Yugi: "Yeah.." *thinks a moment* "Maybe that's why grandpa kept yelling at me!!"  
  
Yami: -_-; "I tried to tell you to take them things off."  
  
AyariChan02: " We still have 5 minutes."  
  
Yami: "Can I tell them about my wonderful win against Kaiba? How I kicked his ass to Timbuktu?"  
  
Yugi: "OOO!! I love that story!!"  
  
Yami: "Story? It was all true."  
  
Seto: *storms on stage* "LIAR!! I WOULD HAVE WON!!!"  
  
Random Fan Girl #3: "KIABA!!! I LOVE YOU!!"  
  
Seto: "I know."  
  
Yugi: "You're full of yourself."  
  
Seto: "I know."  
  
Yami: "Well I still whooped your ass fair and square."  
  
Seto: "DUEL!! I'LL SHOW YOU THE TRUE POWER I HOLD!!"  
  
Yami: "Seto Kaiba. Get over it. I beat you so bad!"  
  
Mokuba: *runs on stage* "MY BIG BROTHER COULD HAVE BEATEN YOU!! Hey Yugi."  
  
Yugi: " 'Sup Mokuba? WELL MY YAMI COULD HAVE DESTROYED YOUR BRO ANY DAY!!!"  
  
Mokuba: "Nothin' much. YEAH RIGHT!!"  
  
AyariChan02: *faces crowd.* " As much as you like to see Seto, Yami, Yugi, and Mokuba argue.. we are out of time. But we will be back with another episode of.. The Yugi Motou Shou!"  
  
Did you like it? Huh? Well tell me who should come in next after Yami Bakura and Marik Ishtar for the next episode. What should Y. Bakura and Marik do? Tell me and I'll write it! ^_^!  
  
Ja-Ne! 


	2. Hostile Take over

The Yugi Motou Shou! Episode 2  
  
Ok. Me no own Yu-Gi-Oh. Ug.  
  
^_^; Sorry that was my cave man instincts taken over.. I'm still hyper! SO HYPER! SO HAPPY AND HYPER!!  
  
The camera begins rolling while Yugi and Yami talk.  
  
Yugi- "What do you think of Téa?"  
  
Yami- "A freaky pshyco bitch."  
  
Yugi- -_-; "Why that? She's not that bad."  
  
Yami- "You're kidding right?"  
  
Yugi- (shakes head stupidly)  
  
Yami- "She always talks about friendship and how we should together and shit. Screw her." (begins to do a bad impression of Téa.) "This symbol represents our friendship." (normal voice) "BLAH! GARBAGE! I nearly threw up in our soul room."  
  
Yugi- -_-; (looks over at 'on air' light) "What's that red light?"  
  
Yami- "On air light. Mean's we're on air."  
  
Yugi- "Shut up."  
  
Yami- "Did you just tell me to shut-"  
  
Yugi- "SSHH!! We're on!"  
  
Yami- "If we were I think that the Authoress would have told us."  
  
Yugi- "Are you serious? She lives to cause us pain and embarrassment! She trys to makes us look stupid and retarded! She wouldn't tell us."  
  
AyariChan02- "You two better start hostin' or else."  
  
Yugi- "or else what?"  
  
Yami- "OOH! Back talked!"  
  
AyariChan02- "I'll step on you."  
  
Yugi- "Damn tall people.."  
  
Yami- (turns to camera) "Hi and welcome to-"  
  
Announcer Dude- "Welcome to the Yugi Motou Show! Starring Yugi Motou and Yami Yugi Motou as our hosts! Featuring Marik Ishtar as our Egyptian freak from down the block and Yami Ryou Bakura as our first and stupidest evil villain! Now to your host's-"  
  
Yami- "That's my job you freak!!"  
  
Yugi- "I hate announcers."  
  
Announcer Dude- "Oh..sorry."  
  
Yami- "Well then. First guess.. Marik Ishtar."  
  
Marik steps on stage and hundreds of fan girls scream for him.  
  
Marik- (waves. He sits down and glares at Yami) What do you want?  
  
Yami- "It's not like this was my idea."  
  
Marik- "So what. It's your fault."  
  
Yami- "How?"  
  
Marik- "Because you host this stupid show."  
  
Yami- "Then if its so stupid leave!"  
  
Marik- "FINE!!" (gets up to walk off.)  
  
AyariChan02- "If you leave I'll rip up Ra." (holds up the Winged Dragon of Ra card threateningly.)  
  
Marik- (sit's down slowly.) "Rip it and I'll rip you."  
  
Yugi- "Well then.. so um.. What do you do?"  
  
Marik- "Try to kill you."  
  
Yugi- "No I mean for fun."  
  
Marik- "Try to kill you.. wait no.. I like to wel.. yeah I think try to kill you basically sums up what I like to do.  
  
Yugi- "FINE BESIDES TRYING TO KILL ME!!"  
  
Marik- ".."  
  
Yugi- "WELL!"  
  
Marik- "Eat."  
  
Yami- -_-; "New subject. Girls. Who do you like?"  
  
Marik- "I ain't telling you."  
  
Yami- "Ain't ain't in the dictionary."  
  
Yugi- "Come on tell us!"  
  
Marik- "I don' wanna!"  
  
Yami- "Tell me.."  
  
AyariChan02- "I'll rip it."  
  
Marik- "No not Ra! Not the god Card Ra!"  
  
Yugi- "Then tell me! Who is it!"  
  
Marik- "Ok I'll tell you.. Do you know the muffin man?"  
  
Yugi- "The muffin man?"  
  
Marik- "Well she's married to the muffin man."  
  
Yami- "The muffin man?"  
  
Marik- "THE MUFFIN MAN!!!"  
  
Yugi- "I know the muffin man!"  
  
Yami- "Who lives on drewry lane?" (realizes it's a bad Shrek pun.) DAMN YOU EGYPTIAN BASTARD!"  
  
Marik- "That's right Pharoh!"  
  
AyariChan02- "We won't have enough time. Yami Bakura get on that stage!"  
  
Yami Bakura- *walks on stage annoying the hundreds of fan girls* "What do you want?"  
  
Marik- "Yami no Bakura konnichiwa."  
  
Yami Bakura- "Omae o korosu."  
  
Yugi- "So Yami Bakura.. what do you like?"  
  
Yami Bakura- "A whole lotta four play and-"  
  
Yugi- "Please man! This is rated PG- 13!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "Fine.. I like to kill you."  
  
Yami- "You mean try."  
  
Yami Bakura- "Omae o korosu."  
  
Yugi- -_-; "Ok.. new topic. Who do you like?"  
  
Yami Bakura- "There is no mortal woman that would satisfy me."  
  
Yami- "What about a mortal man?"  
  
Yami Bakura- "Omae o Korosu."  
  
Yugi- "Guess that's a no."  
  
Marik- "Well she's married to the muffin man."  
  
Yugi- "The muffin man?"  
  
Marik- "THE MUFFIN MAN!"  
  
Yami- "Ok. Forget it. New topic. What do you do now?"  
  
Marik- "Eat."  
  
Yami Bakura- "Explore."  
  
Yugi- "Explore?!" @_@ "Explore what?"  
  
Yami Bakura- "Soul rooms like yours. So I can destroy you form the inside out."  
  
Yami- "I was wondering why I was feeling all tingly.."  
  
Everyone but Yami- "Tingly.." @_@  
  
Marik- "I hope you don't mean you're horn-"  
  
Yami Bakura- "If you are I'll kill you."  
  
Yami- "Not tingly in my pants! No that tingly!"  
  
Everyone But Yami- "Pants?" @_@  
  
Yami- "Let's drop the subject before I kill one of you."  
  
Yami Bakura- "I'd like to see you try."  
  
Marik- "It's only fun and games till some one gets hurt.. then it's hilarious!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "My sentiments exactly."  
  
AyariChan02- "New subject or else!"  
  
Marik- "NO NOT RA!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "Here we go again.."  
  
Marik- "How could you even think about harming the sacred god Ra! You will be surely punished for your small minded threats!"  
  
Yami- "Don't we have some sort of commercial?"  
  
Yugi- "Nah. The authoress is cheap. She thinks that if we get commercial's people will only watch for the commercials."  
  
Marik- You are a moron.  
  
Yami Bakura- Sit quiet you buffoon! I never asked you!"  
  
Marik- "Whos' the current villain here? Shut up you bastard!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "Go be nice annoying Egyptian bastard and sit in the corner!"  
  
Marik- *Pulls out millennium rod* "Don't make me use this!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "Bring it on small fry!"  
  
Marik- "I said not to make me use it! And now I'm using it!"  
  
Yugi- "ESCAPE!!"  
  
The camera falls over so all we can hear is what's going on.  
  
Marik- "COME BACK HERE PHAROH!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "LET ME KILL YOU!" (chainsaw sounds) SLICE 'EM AND DICE 'EM!!"  
  
Marik- "I like Pharoh bits."  
  
Yugi- "STAY AWAY!!"  
  
Yami- "BACK VILE BEASTS!! BACK TOMB ROBBER!! YOU TOO EGYPT FREAK!"  
  
Marik- "Egypt freak.. You will so pay for that."  
  
Yami Bakura- (laughing manically) DIE PHAROH!  
  
Yugi- WHAT DO YOU WHAT FORM US!?  
  
Marik- (French accent) WORLD DOMINATION!!  
  
Yugi- then take this stupid show!!  
  
Yami Bakura- "It's a start.."  
  
Marik- "Well then Simba! RUN! Run. Run and never look back. Kill him."  
  
Random fan girls scream.  
  
The camera comes back on. Yami Bakura is looking at the desk funny. Marik is sitting on the desk.  
  
Marik- "I told you not to jump on desks. They can't support your heavy ass."  
  
Yami Bakura- "Don't start with me."  
  
Random fan girl #3- "Listen to your elders!"  
  
Random fan girl #4- "Shut up! That man is as good as dead! Friggin' zombie!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "I RESENT THAT!"  
  
RFG#3- "I love you! I love you! Love love absolutely love! (runs down stage and hugs Yami Bakura) Who'll marry him to me against his will?!  
  
Marik- *laughing his head off* "marrage?! Yami Bakura you're a wreck!"  
  
RFG#5- "I'll marry you two!!" (runs down stairs) SPEAK NOW FOREVER HOLD YOUR PEACE!!"  
  
Yami Bakura- (screams)  
  
RFG#3- "Are you.. rejecting me!!??" (crying)  
  
Yami Bakura- "of course I am!"  
  
Marik- "OHH! Rejected! In your face! Put that in your cookie and crumble it!!!"  
  
RFG#6- "LET'S STEAL HIS GOLD BANDS AND SELL THEM ON EBAY!!"  
  
Fangirls run down and jump Marik. They all aim for his neck bands.  
  
RFG#7- "They won't come off!"  
  
RFG#6- "PULL HARDER!!"  
  
Marik- "I can't breathe!!"  
  
AyariChan02- "This has gone to far.. TINY!!"  
  
A big dude with the security uniform comes out.  
  
Tiny- "Yeah miss?"  
  
AyariChan02- "Could you save my new host Marik from the fan girls before they kill him." *Yami Bakura screams* "Oh and the other host Yami Bakura from getting married."  
  
Tiny- "Sure thing miss."  
  
The camera cuts off.  
  
Random fan girls can be heard screaming: "CALL ME!!" "I'LL GET YOU ONE DAY!!" "I ALWAYS BE HERE FOR YOU!!"  
  
Yami Bakura- "I want a restraining order on all of them."  
  
Marik- *rubbing his neck* I wan't mine to span 15 miles.  
  
So how did you like it? Tell me please. And who should I feature as guests next time? Tell me and I'll write it! Well Ja-Ne! Review!  
  
-AyariChan02 


	3. A Show

Oh dear... oh dear.. I haven't updated in so long! I feel bad!! I am bad!! BAD AUTHORESS BAD!!! *begins to whack herself uncontrollably with a mallet*  
  
Ryou: "Is that safe?"  
  
Marik: "No."  
  
Yami Bakura: "If she keeps it up she might die." *smiles* "please die oh please!!"  
  
Ryou: "That's no way to talk of a young woman who gave us a home on her story. You should be ashamed!!"  
  
Marik: "A home? You call this a home!!!"  
  
Ryou: "home is where the heart is."  
  
Yami Bakura: "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO READ THOSE SIGNS IN THE HALL MARK STORE!!!"  
  
Ryou: -_-; "Monkey."  
  
Yami Bakura: "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!" *jumps under a randomly appearing rock*  
  
Marik: "Can you breathe?"  
  
Yami Bakura: "The slight reduction of air has giving me a slight concussion. Please leave a message after the beep. BBBEEEEEEEEPPPP."  
  
Marik: "Yami Bakura.. If you can hear me.. You shouldn't be down there.. Call me when you get this message, 'K?"  
  
Ryou: -_-;  
  
Yami Bakura: "Press One for normal delivery. Press Two for an Urgent Delivery."  
  
Marik: "What button?"  
  
Yami Bakura: "I have no buttons.. Butttt *jumps out from under rock* I am pretty. Oh so pretty and witty..."  
  
Yami: *comes out of no where "AND GAYYYYYY!!!!"  
  
Ryou: "AHHH!!! The attack of the Flaming Faggot!!"  
  
Joey: "But a faggot is a bundle of sticks.."  
  
Marik: "Does this mean all this time I was being called a bundle of sticks?"  
  
Téa: "Our friendship will protect us from the Flaming Faggot!!!"  
  
Yami: *on fire* "Homo!! HOMO!! HOMO!!!!"  
  
Marik: *stabs Téa in the head*  
  
Téa: "YOU CANNOT KILL FRIENDSHIP!!!"  
  
Ryou: "SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!!!" *pulls out a bazooka and shoots Téa."  
  
Téa: "..." X_X * head flys off. Dead*  
  
AyariChan02: "I'm a BAD AUTHOR!!!!" *picks up bazooka and bgins to hit herself with it*  
  
Yami: "I am the-" *wearing a sheet for a cape* "FLAMING FAGGOT!!! PROTECTOR OF THE STICKS!!!"  
  
Yugi: "AND I AM HIS SIDEKICK!!" *wearing a mask that barely covers his eyes* "TWIG BOY!!!"  
  
Ryou: -_-; "Monkey."  
  
Joey, Yugi, Yami, and Yami Bakura jump under the rock.  
  
AyariChan02: BAD ME!!!!  
  
Ryou: "I'm sure this chapter you post will be good."  
  
AyariChan02: *sniffles* "Really Ryou-Chan?"  
  
Ryou: "Of course.."  
  
AyariChan02: "I knew you were on of my favorite Bishonen from Yu-Gi-Oh for a reason."  
  
Ryou: "Really? I'm honored."  
  
AyariChan02: "Because you are Albino."  
  
Ryou: "I AM NOT!!! DAMMIT WOMAN!!! I mean.. I'm not albino. An albino person would have red or pink eyes."  
  
AyariChan02: "And because you're-"  
  
Yami Bakura: "HEY!!! I'm you're favorite!!"  
  
AyariChan02: *pats YB on the head* "I know. You are my favorite too."  
  
Marik: "I'm Her favorite!!!"  
  
AyariChan02: "I know you too. Everyone is!"  
  
Téa: *somehow comes back to life with a head* ME TOOO???!!  
  
Everyone: *blank faces* "Except you.."  
  
Téa: "You just need friends. You should love everyone."  
  
Ryou: "MY LITTLE FRIEND LIKES YOU!!!" *shoots Téa with his Bazooka.*  
  
Téa: X_X *dead*  
  
AyariChan02: "Ok.. so After a long time I have this for you."  
  
.  
  
.  
  
.  
  
.  
  
Yugi Motou Show Part 3  
  
Spotlights shine on combing the stage for the hosts.  
  
Anouncer Dude: Welcome back to the next episode of the Yugi Mot-"  
  
AyariChan02: "We have a new script.. Will you pay attention to the signs in you dressing room!!"  
  
AD: *Ghetto accent* "Look I ain't get no sign so you better just calm that friggin' attitude down." *rolls eyes*  
  
AyariChan02: "Do I have to fire you?"  
  
AD: "Please let me stay. You found me on the street. Tired, hungry, and cold. You gave me a job. Made me rich. I owe it all to you. You are my Jesus. You are my goddess."  
  
AyariChan02: *snoring* ".."  
  
AD: "Erm.. Right.. Please let me stay. You saved me and I owe my life to you.."  
  
AyariChan02: *wakes up* "huh? What? Oh.. Yeah.. Right. You me.. Will you hurry it up."  
  
AD: "YES MISS!!" *back to his smooth Jeopardy Voice* "Now welcome to the.. Yami Bakura and Marik Ishtar Show! Starring-"  
  
Marik: "Excuse me?! I was placed first on that script. Correct yourself at once."  
  
AD: "Ye-"  
  
Yami Bakura: "Don't listen to that gold wearing freak! I am rightfully first. Due to the fact I am much more important than him and his gold!"  
  
AD: "We-"  
  
Marik: "Don't take commands from an albino! Listen to me!! I am your master!!" *pulls out millennium rod*  
  
AD: *dazed* "Yes.. Master.. Welcome to the Marik and-"  
  
Yami Bakura: *tackles Marik to the ground.*  
  
Marik: *screams and the millennium rod flys from his hands* "Get off!!! GET OFF!!!"  
  
Yami Bakura: "SHUT UP!! IT'S MORE MY SHOW THAN YOURS!!!"  
  
Marik: "RAPE!!! RAPE!!! STATUARY RAPE!!! I'M ONLY A MINOR!!!"  
  
AD: Welcome to a show. Starring Yami Bakura, our pink bunny loving villain and Marik, a care bear lover as our hosts! Introducing Yami, our first guest, An Egyptian spirit that loves playing Mario Party 5! And our second guest Heero Yuy from Gundam Wing, an actual fan of the Spice Girls!!  
  
Yami Bakura: "Why would I rape you!! You have nothing to rape!"  
  
Marik: "I have balls and a penis and it's better than yours!!!"  
  
Goku's voice: "DRAGON BALLS!!!"  
  
Yami Bakura: *gasp* "You lie!! The only thing you have is that millennium rod in your pocket!!"  
  
5 minutes later..  
  
Yami Bakura: *sitting at desk* "I can't belive you said I'm anti-genital."  
  
Marik: "Anti-genital? Is that a word?"  
  
Yami Bakura: "I DO NOT LIKE PINK BUNNIES!!!!"  
  
Marik: -_-;  
  
Yami Bakura: "I hate bunnies!! BUNNIES ARE RETARDED ANIMALS THAT POOP!!! THEY WILL NEVER BE LOVED BY ME!!!" *wearing a shirt with pink bunnies on it and pink bunny slippers.*  
  
Marik: -_-;  
  
Yami Bakura: "KEEP THOSE LIES TO YOUR SELF!!!!"  
  
Marik: "Calm down and sit you nimrod."  
  
Yami Bakura: "Nimrod? Who's the on with the rod in his back pocket?"  
  
Marik: *dirty stare.*  
  
Yami Bakura: "Yeah you stay quiet! I am ruler now I had the plan to take over!!! This is rightfully mine!! I am the CHEESE!!! I AM THE WINE!!!!"  
  
Marik: "You are the drunken moron."  
  
Yami Bakura: "I only had one drink before the show."  
  
Marik: "Then what was in those shot glasses?"  
  
Yami Bakura: "Kool-Aid."  
  
Marik: "Tequila flavored Kool-Aid. I was not aware they had this flavor."  
  
Yami Bakura: "You drank out of my shot glass?!"  
  
Marik: "No I saw the bottle."  
  
Yami Bakura: "How'd you get smart?"  
  
Marik: "I have decided to find a cure for Erectile Dysfunction."  
  
Yami Bakura: "That's why we own Viagra."  
  
Marik: O-O  
  
Yami Bakura: "Ryou's been complaining that he hasn't been sexually happy lately. I thnk he's deformed."  
  
Marik: O-O *passes out from TMI*  
  
Yami Bakura: *reading what authoress wrote* "TMI? What's TMI?"  
  
AyariChan02: *cough* "Too Much Information" *cough cough*  
  
Yami Bakura: "Ohhhhh"  
  
Marik: "I AM SCARED!!!!"  
  
Yami Bakura: "You though I was telling the truth? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I AM NEVER TRUTHFUL!!!!!"  
  
AyariChan02: "I think a guest is in order."  
  
Marik: "Please. Don't leave me alone with him!!!!!"  
  
AyariChan02: "Allright. YAMI!!!"  
  
Yami: *runs out in a shirt with Princess "Peach" Toadstool on it.* "HIYA!!!!" *sits down in his chair swinging his feet.*  
  
Marik: "ACK!!!" . "It's evil!!! Take it away!!! SAVE ME FROM EVIL!!!"  
  
Yami: "I ain't evil.. well I was.." *smiles* "But that's all over. So.. What will you ask me first?"  
  
Yami Bakura: "Awfully chipper today."  
  
Yami: "I found some shot glasses in a dressing room. They tasted good."  
  
Yami Bakura: "He he.. Well actually.. WAIT!!!! THOSE WERE MY SHOTGLASSES!! So did you like what they said?"  
  
Yami: "Well I drank them and then for some reason I couldn't read."  
  
Marik: "Tequila."  
  
Yami: "Is that Japanese?"  
  
Marik: "Spanish."  
  
Yami: "I like Japanese drinks better."  
  
Marik: "Sake.."  
  
Yami Bakura: "Soo Yame... What-"  
  
Yami: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! HE CALLED ME YAME!!!!" * falls out of his chair laughing* "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!"  
  
Yami Bakura: "It ain't funny."  
  
AyariChan02: "You boys are being stupid so.." *sits a big cage on the desk* "have fun." *walks away.*  
  
Yami, Yami Bakura, and Marik stare at the cage. The cage makes funny noises and shakes.  
  
Yami: "You open it." *pushes Yami Bakura*  
  
Yami Bakura: "NO!!!* Pushes Marik* "You go."  
  
Marik: "No way. I've seen things like this. Black man always dies first."  
  
Yami Bakura: "That's only in those moving pictures Ryou was showing me."  
  
Marik: "Well Mr. 'Only in Moving Picture's' I believe the pictures and I ain't going for it."  
  
Yami: "Then this leaves it to me!! THE ONLY HERO OF THE SHOW!!!"  
  
Marik: "Yeah you die first.'  
  
Yami: "I'm so happy you allowed me the pleasure to save you as-"  
  
Yami Bakura and Marik: "GO DAMMIT!!!"  
  
Yami: "Oh yeah!!!" *steps to the cage* "I can do this. I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. I think I can.  
  
Marik: OH!!!! I saw that in a book of some sort. Ishizu tried to read it and I ripped it and threw it in her face and said 'EAT MY TURD BITCH!!'. I think I was 13."  
  
Yami Bakura: "You are a crazy bastard... It was in the book The Little Engine That Could."  
  
Marik: "How would you know?"  
  
Yami Bakura: "When Ryou taught me english he read that."  
  
Marik: -_-.. "Don't believe you."  
  
Yami Bakura: "You think I liked that shitty book?"  
  
Marik: "You like bunnies. What difference does it make?"  
  
Yami Bakura: ".. Well.. It wasn't that bad. I like the part where he was going and got nervous and then remembered-"  
  
Marik: "Shut it."  
  
Yami Bakura: "DID YOU TELL ME TO SHUT IT!!!!???"  
  
Marik: "Duh."  
  
Yami Bakura: "I AM THE CHEESE DO NOT TELL THE CHEESE WHAT TO DO!!!!"  
  
Marik: "Erm. You are the what?"  
  
Yami Bakura: "THE CHEESE!!!"  
  
AyariChan02: *walks in front of the camera.* "Because of arguments among the useless characters in Yu-Gi-Oh, we have to show a erm.. Duke Devlin has a segment now."  
  
Camera turns to the next stage and Duke Devlin sits on a bar like counter filing his nails.  
  
Duke Devlin: "Huh?"  
  
AyariChan02: "Get started!"  
  
Devlin: "Ok. Like welcome to like my show thingy. It's like about cosmetics and stuff and its like called Devlin's Makeovers!" *fakely cheers* "Now.. To get started we need a man.." *grabs Joey* "Like sit."  
  
Joey: "Wha? Hey I ain't sign up for this!"  
  
Devlin: "I said sit. Now we're gonna like makeover like Joey."  
  
Joey: ^_^ "Ooooo!!! A MAKE OVER!!!"  
  
Devlin: "Like that's what I said. Now.. First make up and hair.." *pulls out a huge make up kit.* "Usually we start with a base color."  
  
Joey: "MAKE UP!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! "  
  
Devlin: "But in this case we'll like start with a like anesthetic." *pulls out a mallet and hits Joey on the head*  
  
Joey: X_X *passed out*  
  
Devlin: "Ok. I'll show you the like product."  
  
5 minutes later..  
  
Joey: *dressed up in drag* "HOLY CRAP!!! I'M.. I'M.. I'm sexy.."  
  
Devlin: "And that's how you like make an ugly mutt into a like beauty queen."  
  
Joey: "OOoooo. Can I stay dressed in drag and do the hula?"  
  
Devlin: "If you like want to like scare people."  
  
Joey: "I will now live out my life long dream to dress in drag and do the hula!!!" *begins to hula*  
  
Tristan Taylor: "Are you looking for a fat hunk a juicy meat-"  
  
Gay Fan Guys: "GO GO GO JOEY!!! GO GO GO JOEY!!!"  
  
Joey: *stops* "Now no. I ain't that bent on my dreams."  
  
Random Fangirls: COME ON BABE!!! HULA HULA HULA!!!  
  
Joey: *grins* "Now that's what I'm talkin' 'bout. Some ladies."  
  
Mean while on the first stage..  
  
Yami: "I know I can." *reaches for the cage door *  
  
Yami Bakura: *covers eyes* "I can't watch!!!!!  
  
Marik: "Isn't there another way!!!"  
  
Yami: *flips open the cage door* "NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Something furry jumps on Yami's face..  
  
Yami Bakura and Marik: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
To Be Continued..  
  
You the readers have an opportunity to decide what jumped on Yami's face. Tell me what you think it should be and I'll use the weirdest idea in the next part of Episode 3 of the Yugi Motou Show.. 


	4. Public Service Announcement

AyariChan02: Hello Loyal Readers..  
  
Readers: *cough* yearight* cough*  
  
AyariChan02: I HEARD THAT YOU STINKIN' BAST-  
  
Ryou and Yugi: Remember the happy thoughts!!  
  
Téa: I'll hug you and you'll be much- *shot in the head by Ryou again* X_X *dead*  
  
Ryou: DAMMIT WHORE!!! STAY DEAD!!! WHEN I SHOOT YOU, YOU STAY DEAD!! *hyperventilating*  
  
AyariChan02: Ok back to my public service announcement-  
  
Yami Bakura: OOOOOoooooooooooooooooooo!!! Are we cleaning the graveyards?  
  
Kaiba: Can we clean Joey? Because he's starting to smell like a dog too.  
  
Joey: *sniffs arm pits* HEY!!! I don't stink!!!! Take that back Kaiba!!! DAMN MONEY BAGS!!!  
  
Kaiba: Bring it on Mutt.  
  
Joey: Oh. It's already been brung.  
  
AyariChan02: WOULD YOU PEOPLE SHUT UP!!! I'D LIKE TO MAKE MY ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!  
  
Everyone whimpers and turns in to sad chibis.  
  
AyariChan02: Quit with the face Joey. It ain't gonna work. Now where was I.. oh yes. Now.. There's a point in time when the audience must be involved.. This is you're chance to-  
  
Yami Bakura: Can she be any more machine like?  
  
Bandit Keith: *runs across the stage wearing nothing but a sign that reads: Machines RULE!!! Covering his area.*  
  
Marik: ACK!!! . BLINDED AGAIN!!!!  
  
Espa Roba: Inside you're mind I'm reading you liked it...  
  
Marik: ACK!!!. EVIL LYING MIND READERS!!!  
  
Weevil: My bugs will force you to-  
  
Marik: ACK!!! . EVIL 3 FOOT TALL BUG MEN!!!!  
  
Yami: EWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BUGS!!!!!  
  
Weevil: Bugs are not eww. They are cool!!  
  
Ryou: *cough* No wonder he hasn't got a girl friend *cough* *cough*  
  
Joey: *cough* True true.*cough*  
  
Strings: Shall I dispose of the mind reader and the bug?  
  
Marik: PLEASE!!!  
  
Arkana: Then have we a show for you!!!!  
  
Marik: No show!!! Just make it go away!!!!  
  
Ryou: *pulls out his bazooka* WHO WANTS SOME!!!!!  
  
Weevil: You wouldn't dare hurt my precious!!!  
  
Joey: *cough* Lord of the Rings *cough*  
  
Ryou: *blows up Perfectly Ultimate Great Moth* PRECIOUS MY ASS!!!!  
  
Yugi: Hit Pinch Hopper next!!  
  
Yami: And then Insect Queen!!! That damn Ho!!!  
  
Mai: There's only one position for ho on this show, and it's taken.  
  
Joey: *cough* by you *cough*  
  
Mokuba: Big Brother.. I'm scared..  
  
Kaiba; It's ok. It's only Joey.  
  
Mokuba: Not of that dammit. It's himmmmm..  
  
Kaiba: Right.. Did you take your medicine this morning?  
  
Mokuba: NOPE!!!! I'm drug free!! It's the way to be!!  
  
Yugi: Then how come when I slept over you had pot under the mattress?  
  
Mokuba: Don't blow my cover yo!!  
  
Yugi: I mean that was some good Pixie Dust we had.. Right Yami?  
  
Yami: I thought you called that substance Cocaine?  
  
Yugi: COCAINE!!! MOKUBA!!! YOU HOLDIN' OUT ON ME DAWG!!!!  
  
Mokuba: I'll show you the secret stash later.  
  
Kaiba: Cocaine? Mokuba.. I want some..  
  
Noa: Damn. No wonder I over threw your mind so easily.  
  
Mokuba: But I got it back.  
  
Yugi: After that cocaine wore off.  
  
Mokuba: So I did it right?  
  
AyariChan02: People. I outlawed the discussion of illegal drugs already!!! Now any way-  
  
Mokuba: 1st amendment sista!  
  
AyariChan02: Ain't got Shit on me.  
  
Yami: Then who's diapers were in your dressing room?  
  
Mokuba: *blushes* Well actually..  
  
Kaiba: We haven't fully potty trained Mokuba yet.  
  
AyariChan02: I hope you all are paying more attention to me out there in the audience.. Now what I was going to say is that I want ya'll to decide what was in the cage. What attacked Yami. I want your opinions and I'll but the craziest idea in Yugi Motou Show Episode 3 Part .  
  
Yami: That means that I could be attacked by a chipmunk in a ballerina dress with a fairy wand and a bow on its head that speaks Sailor Moon phrases!!!??????  
  
Marik: ACK!!! . NOT THE CHIPMUNK IN THE BALLERINA DRESS WITH A FARIY WAND AND A BOW ON IT'S HEAD THAT SPEAKS IN SAILOR MOON PHRASES!!!  
  
AyariChan02: Yep.  
  
Yami Bakura: Where's a shrink when you need one..  
  
Mokuba: KISS ME I'M IRISH MEXICAN!!  
  
Marik: I'm Italian jewish.  
  
Joey: I'm a hot, horny Mexican.  
  
Kaiba: More like a humping Chihuahua.  
  
Yugi: I'm a bird!  
  
Mai: I'm a plane!!  
  
Ryou: I'm super man!!!!  
  
Yami: I'm a cat!  
  
Everyone stare at Yami. Including readers.  
  
Readers: @_@ *stare at Yami*  
  
Yami Bakura: You know.. I'm a raging lesbian in a males body.  
  
Everyone stare at Yami Bakura. You too readers.  
  
Readers: @_@ *stare a Yami Bakura*  
  
Yami Bakura: THAT'S RIGHT!! YOU ALL WILL EVENTUALLY BOW DOWN TO ME!! THE RAGING LESBIAN IN A MALES BODY!!!! I AM THE CHEESE!!! BOW TO THE LESBIAN CHEESE!!! 


End file.
